Definitions and Misconceptions

Roxanne Darling in the fieldI have created these Personal Definitions and Misconceptions for commonly used terms and ideas to give you a clearer understanding of how I work. These phrases are used by many different people, each of whom is operating from a different perspective. Communication and language are precious tools to me, so, let’s sit down and have a chat together!

Personal Definitions

Consciousness: the ability to observe your self and have a frame of reference for what is happening to you in any given moment, even if you cannot make immediate external changes
Power: the self-reliant and unlimited energy source that fuels your imagination, choices, and actions, so long as Adult You is in charge.

Authentic: operating from behind your own eyes, knowing your personal preferences, and willing to claim them in your day to day actions.

Spirituality: the fourth dimension of our selves alongside our thoughts, our feelings, and our actions, that forms our connection to the larger universe of space and time.

Adult Authority: your right to exist as a human being with all the power that comes with that, regardless of who you are, what you do, where you come from, or what you want.
Big Energy: the source of unlimited intelligence that is available in our universe. It has the ability to clear out old neurological patterns you no longer need and to minimize obstacles so you can experience more of your true self.

True Self: the one and only expression of life on earth as YOU. This is not about pressuring yourself to fit in nor is it about resigning yourself the loneliness of an outsider. It is about embracing your subjective preferences in this moment of time and understanding that in their heart of hearts, and soul of souls, everyone is different from each other. We all belong to the Everyone is Different Club and the only thing to bring is your True Self.

Edge: It’s that competitive place or creative place where the combination of one’s qualities and gifts create an obvious delineation as compared to others.

Getting Blissed: It is about having your inner and outer worlds sync up more easily so you can free up your energy and your ideas and point them in the direction of your true desires.

Emotional Intelligence: Coined by Daniel Goleman, I use it to help illustrate the difference between how Kid You and Adult You experience emotions and respond to them in others, in the framework of The Three You’s.

graphic for in the transition with rox logo

Misconceptions

You may think that being a grownup is boring and burdened with responsibility but what I’ve seen is that when people can distinguish between kid and adult thinking, they access far more power and self-acceptance than they thought possible. That’s because the art of claiming your “adult authority” is what frees you to create your life on your own terms, without being dependent on others.

You may think that consciousness is an abstract concept that doesn’t affect your day to day life, but what I’ve seen is that it can help you understand energy discrepancies, such as when people say one thing and do another. What you may find, is that engaging with your consciousness is like having a translator or partner alongside you for support.

You may think that spirituality is pretty much the same as religion, but what I’ve seen is that many people are looking for a new sense of meaning in their lives that is free of old definitions and practices. What you may find is that by being open to your spiritual or soulful impulses, without having to categorize them, you can access more creativity and manage stress and anxiety with greater ease.

You may think that getting coaching or joining others in mindfulness sessions or spiritual retreats will dull your competitive or creative edges but what I’ve seen is that when people go deeper into themselves, their gifts become more clearly defined and they can cultivate their true desires in more focused and results-driven ways.

You may think that bigger (or faster) is always better but what I’ve seen is that when people change the word “better” to “preferred”, it becomes much easier to know just how big or how fast you want to go — or not. By claiming your own subjective personal preferences, you can have much more confidence about the goals you choose to pursue and let go of the ones you decide to leave behind.

graphic for in the transition with rox logo



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