Maya Angelou and Me, On Being Human

book cover for May Angelou - I know why the caged bird sings“The same issues that face and beleaguer every human being in the world and still do, have beleaguered me and still do. So that the challenge for me to meet you this morning, to get up, defy gravity; to stand erect and to remain erect, and to be absolutely present with you so that everything I know I have here in this chair with me now.”
~ Maya Angelou
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings on

Day after day, we think something is “wrong” when Difficult barges through the door. When actually, it’s just reminding us of the choice we made to be human. It deserves a seat at the table as much as Joy and Freedom, even if the discomfort and the effort make us want to slam something. Like a door. Or a fist. Or a phone.

Which is all well and good in the abstract. Yesterday, though, I had one of those really hard days. “Beleaguered” barely scratches the surface! So I want to share with you my end of day summary notes in the Writer Circle to which I belong.

At the end of each day, this is where I commit to shedding the light of consciousness on my occasional suffering, and keep that suffering out of the hands of my monkey mind, what I call Kid me. Perhaps it will be of use. At least it’s something for me to read (and remember) the next time I feel like crap!

What do you feel good about?

Getting through another emotionally difficult day.

What challenges or obstacles came up for you?

I don’t want to go into details here; suffice it to say I have some disappointments I am experiencing and still grieving from time to time over loss of my dog. Doing my best not to get on my case.

What negative self-statements did you notice?

You should be able to use some of your automagic tools and snap out of this! Otherwise, you know, you are just another impostor.

What positive statements can you replace them with?

Yes, that is your simplistic – and inaccurate – view of how life actually works. I prefer to be grateful that my regular work was not that intense today and I had the luxury of laying around a lot, crying as it came up, and all this resulting in me actually feeling better now. Even if not yet, “Great!” No rush; I’d prefer to turn over the rocks and understand them.

How will you acknowledge or celebrate what you’ve accomplished today?

I made a new music playlist to support my writing. Hoping to add more songs to it tomorrow.
I also bought a book on Kindle to read. Men Explain Things to Me on

In reading through this now, a day later, it is remarkably neutral and simple. Even that observation lifts things for me, and for that, I am grateful. How do you engage with Ms. Difficult?

roxanne darling's signature

About Roxanne

I use a specialized form of coaching to help people be more of who they are and less of who they're not. I lived in Hawaii for 17 years and now reside in Santa Fe, NM. I work with clients around the world. I invite you to join my "Get Blissed" email list for updates.


  1. I can identify with all of it…especially the “imposter” one. My go-to, be-mean-to-myself is “after all these years of personal development/spiritual learning, and you still can’t create a life without issues?”. It feels really sucky so happily I don’t stay there very long anymore! It’s good to have tools to use to get through times like this.

    Sending you love as you transition through this period…losing a cherished friend is difficult. <3

    • Kate – I am beginning to think that the only thing to “learn” so to speak is that these beleaguered days and moments are a natural part of the human experience. Your love received with lots of gratitude, and radiated back out as Lexi would do!

  2. We suffer for the loss, then eventually become grateful for the time that our loved one graced us with his or her amazing and loving presence… The momentary feeling of emptiness, reminds us that we might seem alone for the moment, but in truth we are never alone, just removed for a moment from our fullness, so once we feel whole again, we will appreciate it even more… Blessings to you during your transition, may the love that was opened by their presence, be opened even more by their omnipresence! Open to the love that you are (have always been and will forever be) and you are never alone… May blessings, peace and love be with you always…

  3. El, I just love this that you said:
    “may the love that was opened by their presence, be opened even more by their omnipresence!”

    Thank you so much for bringing your presence here.