Resistance. What a concept! Resistance to change. Resistance to caring for yourself, resistance to letting the world know about your abilities. It weaves in and out of my life (yours too I am guessing) sometimes with the weight of a mountain gorilla and other times as quiet and clever and sly as a fox. It can be of any sort – you get my drift.
I’ve noticed over the past year my resistance to sharing divine openings here on Maui. Crazy, you might say, given the high percentage of people here who are into the pursuit of consciousness and who embrace just about anything alternative!
But a funny thing happened on the way to my sharing: my business grew and grew and hence I was facing a conundrum of time-space limitations. Wrapped up with a nice, neat, red bow of resistance.
The way I have been managing this is to notice it, feel it, and not add more pressure to myself with the “gotta, musta, shoulda” self-talk. Because at the end of the day, none of it matters. There is no moral imperative for me (or you) to do anything in particular. So I’ve let this brew and percolate, I’ve played with the high energy in my business, and I’ve known that things will come together for me and with me, whenever.
So feeling my way through this now, today, I created time and space to feel some low-level resistance to announcing a three-hour divine openings program that I created. I just love discovering these analogies, so I’m going to share with you the dialog I had with the presence:
Me, human Rox, small self co-mingled:
Just trust the presence to bring people to you! You know how irritating it is all those people who proselytize and push their agendas on others. You don’t want to be like them. Or confused with them. I want to be very clean in my energy and approach, not cluttered with pressure or discrepancies.
Large Self, the presence:
True enough, however, you have tools that are easy to use (Facebook, Google+, email list) and make it easy to share without being “in your face” yet there they sit. Sharing is what you do so naturally. It is what drew you into being one of the first leaders in social media. In so many situations, when it is about others, you can’t not share! Don’t you find it odd that you are reluctant to share the things that are most powerful and valuable to you? Do you see that your small self has wrapped this up in some “pretend consciousness” or in a kid’s version of what consciousness would look like?
Since you do believe that each person is the divine in human form, what makes you think they can’t handle a share from you? Yes they are bombarded by other people sharing – which could mean you might want to ramp this up some just to have a chance at getting even a smidgen of attention!
Me, in transition:
Well, yes, thank you! [Pause] I see your points. [Longer pause] Let me sit with this emotional aversion I have to the pushiness energy. Let me frame this like I framed other things: Rox, you are SO polite, you could stand to step out of your politeness comfort zone and you would still be standing on the far “right” side of politeness. [Pause to feel the resistance and thank it for showing up so I can see it.]
Large Self, the presence:
Yes, exactly. In this desire to be so clean and polite, driven by kid fears, you have gone so extreme in your resistance to change that you created new challenges. You know there is such a thing as too clean, right? Think of your intestinal tract. Yes, you can eat to abandon and fill it with all sorts of stuff. In your case (this is not true for everyone) you feel like crap afterwards, and regret it. Likewise, you can strip down your menu and do all sorts of internal cleanses, yet then you lose some life force! Your gut actually prefers a nice rich set of flora and fauna to help you digest your daily nourishment.
So, what if your so-called marketing was just like you? Natural, flowery (as in dancing with flowers!) yet direct, colorful, cheerful, easy-going, powerful but without pressure, clean but not devoid of life force, simple but not shallow? You are in part a dragon, for goodness sakes – a sweet water dragon. Can you see how confusing it is to hide that? Can you feel how easy and FUN this can be?
For 15 years you used a channeler to connect with knowledge beyond the here and now, asking for the ability to connect direct. It showed up and you have that ability now and it is playing out in incredible ways in your life. And the lives of those around you. As you like to say, #HowCoolIsThat? It’s very cool!
Me, awake:
OMG! I love that! And of course it seems so simple now that the molecules have been sorted out. Clean but not sterile. Descriptive, but shut up as soon as I feel the energy flowing. It’s all about the energy. The energy communicates much easier and clearer than the words. But use my 10% consciousness and free will to get the party started. And of course the only person I am responsible to bring, is me. Just plain authentic Rox.
Love,
Photo credit: To thine own self be true
